Assalamu'alaikum....

It's 2.25am, and I still can't sleep. Uh-oh.... I can NOT miss work tomorrow. Anyway, today was pretty packed for me with trying to finalize some documents, kickboxing and of course, DDR. However, after kickboxing today, Ayun and I ditched butts 'n gutts and decided to do some retail therapy instead at Briarwood Mall. I came out with two new spaghettis and one printed top. Awesome :)~ . Anyway, on the way there, Ayun told me something that , if I was a better woman than I am right now, I would go check that "thing" out. As it is, I'm a bitch, so whatcha gonna do about it? I realized that for a person who's only 5 ft 3, I can pack a lot of anger in my frame, heheh, 'cause even after kickboxing (and loads of.. ermm... imagining stuff), I was still itching for.. ermm... payback. Heheh. When the heck did I become so vindictive.

Today was certainly NOT my day. Everything that could go wrong, did. I can't even think about today without feeling tired. Anyway, I've come to the conclusion that spring is NOT my season, 'cause every single big drama in my life happens during the summer. Maybe having too much free time on my hands is not so good for me.

Time to be vague... people, stop reading right now 'cause I'm gonna stop making sense.

Things happen, shit happens, good things happen. For the same event, a lot of people would feel different things, Just because something good happened, doesn't mean everyone will be happy about it. And vice versa, not everyone feels bad when shitty things happen. For example, if shit happens to people that I don't really like, such as a certain academic advisor, I would be jumping up and down for joy. But that's just me.

I am extremely stubborn. Very much so. I make up my own mind about something and until I want to change it, then that's the way it's gonna be. I also don't read other people's blogger unless someone's gettin' married or I REALLY, REALLY have nothing to do. I can love people with all my heart and I can also hate with every fibre in my being. I can also feel things in between those two extremes. I can be an angel and I can be a bitch. I can be everything in your dreams and I can also be your living nightmare. I can be your best friend one moment and completely turn on you the next. I can be your lover today and your enemy tomorrow. Whatever part I play in your life, dear reader, is completely up to you and the things you do for me and especially the things you do to me.

I like it when things are out in the open. I like to know that I can trust my friends. I like to be able to be comfortable in my own skin and not feel like the pair of jeans in your closet that you only wear when you have absolutely NOTHING else to wear. I like being needed, but I don't like being used. I especially don't like feeling I'm the dirt beneath some else's shoes. I hate knowing that there are so many people in my life that fits into "that" description, in one way or another. I hate knowing there are so many people NOT in my life who also fit into "that" description. Whatever "that" is, dear reader, is something that I cannot be bothered to explain.

I need things to be settled quickly. I hate procrastinating when it comes to things that really matter to me. I hate that two years ago, you hurt me, and now you're back and you expect things to be okay. Too bad, honey, because you're two years too late. You sat on your ass and did NOTHING, you deserve nothing from me, and especially not the best of me. Just because I tolerated your shit before doesn't mean I feel the same way now. Especially not with the other things that are happening in my life. Eat shit and go die, biatch, I might not hold a grudge for the smaller things but there was nothing small about what you did.

There.