Assalamu'alaikum and hi:,

I cannot believe that I actually survived this week. But I did! And I survived not only with my sanity intact, but I was actually on top of everything, had all of my homework done, went to office hours, and I was able to even help other people. Yay! Alhamdulillah sgt2.... It's been a way, way, way hectic week for me, not one day did I come home without feeling extremely hungry, tired, and ready to collapse, but still having to push on because I have something due the next day or the day after. But the week is almost over, and I'm still sane. Thank goodness.

Now all I have to look forward to is the Ramayana performance on Sunday, in which Deera, Wann and I are gonna be in ("The Ramayana: Gongs of Truth", Hill Auditorium, Sunday Feb 1st 2004, 4pm). I have the poster of the event mounted on my door, hehe, after it's over, I'm gonna have it in my room as sort of a keepsake of my first performance ever in the US. In a way, I can't wait, because we practiced like hell for this, but I'm just so, so nervous, especially since Mas Wasi keeps changing stuff on the last minute. I know that's how creative people work (yeah, I've been in other stuff where same thing happens), but it makes me really nervous to have to memorize new things every day. My head are just filled with dance steps these last few days, what with this event and the cultural show later on. I'll be so glad after Sunday is over, at least one thing will be settled.

Here's more good news: I've been given a bid by Phi Sigma Rho. Meaning I've been invited to join the sorority (it's a social sorority for girls in engineering). Yay! I went to the pledge meetings, and it was so much fun, so I'm so thinking about saying yes. It's so exciting, Tammy came to my room on Wednesday to give me a balloon with "Congratulations!" written on it and an invitation card to dinner on Friday. Which brings me to my next story...

Being the floopy-head I am, I mistakenly though the dinner was today. So I was kinda in a pickle because I had dance practice at 5.30 (or so I though)and office hours I had to go to. As it is, things worked out kinda okay, due to my mistakes. I decided that I wanna skip the first part of practice today and come later. So after my Tech Com class finished at 5.30pm, I went to eat sushi at Mujo, opened my computer assignment and realized, dang, there's a mistake and I have to go to office hours. So I rushed to GG Brown, went to see the GSI, asked my comp question, then waited to ask another hw question, couldn't get to him through the throng of students, so I left at around 6.40pm. By then I though I was dead meat because the dinner, I remembered, was at 6.30 pm. I rushed to Lurie, tried opening the doors, which I couldn't, and I felt kinda funny. So I fished around my backpack for my invitation, saw the date on it, and wondered why did I pick today out of all days to be a perfect idiot. But anyway, I rushed to the music school, hoping to salvage whatever time I have for practice (remember, I thought practice was at 5.30pm, and it was close to 7 at that time). I went to the gamelan room, met up with Amrita, asked her "What time is practice today, am I really late?", and she said "Practice is at 7, no, you're not late at all, just in time". Phew. Two wrongs do not make a right, but in this case, the logical double-negation rule applies. Haha... Good thing I went to practice too, Mas Wasi changed a few steps.

Tomorrow I only have one class, then it's music school at 6, acceptance dinner at 6.30pm, whatever practice I can get after that again at music school, and cultural show rehearsal at 8 in Pierpont.

Life is full, life is busy, life is good :). Almost makes me happy that my love life is non-existant, haha. But that's another story altogether, heheh....:) ...

Wassalam...

Assalamu'alaikum...

Finally, I have time to jot down something. My first EECS 370 is officially finished, yay! Thank you thank you thank you so much to Ijat for helping me out, siap bangun pagi hari Sabtu. So now all I have to do is to keep on top of my other homeworks and I should be okay. Right now I'm taking a break from my AI textbook that I've been reading for the past half hour. I like the subject a lot, but it's kinda heavy that if I don't stop reading for a bit, I'll never be able to absorb everything, heheh. But seriously, after the project is done, it's like this big weight had been lifted straight off my shoulders. *Sigh*... sometimes I wonder why did I pick this line of work. But if I am to be perfectly honest, a lot of the times, I like the rush, the adrenaline rushing through you as you try to have your program up and running and meeting the deadline. The downside: not much time for the other things that I like to do. And I haven't really hung out with my friends for about three weeks now. *Sigh*.

Today, we're going to get our dance costumes for Sunday's performance. I've gained pounds in the last semester which I haven't shaken off yet (and I do mean shaken, heheh) , so I hope everything fits. And I finally told mom that I would be dancing.... in front of people. She took it pretty well and promptly went on a new subject: my aunt's constant bragging about her kids. Puh-leeeeze. Macam anak die sorang je yang pandai, yang cantik, yang terrer. Macam anak die sorang je yang bagus. Sometimes I wonder if my aunt only calls my mom only when she has something new to brag about. I'm so glad that my mom is MY mom.

Anyway, mummy dearest wanted to make me new clothes and ship them to me. Yay! I'm getting neeeeeeeewwww stuff..... neeeeeeewwww clothes, hahahahah,.. me happy, why? Because the cloth that she's going to use happens to be my birthday present from my second bro. So it's like my late late late birthday present. Ahaks! Can't wait.

Anyway, today as I was going back to my room, I noticed that the snowman that some of the freshmen built last weekend had suddenly turned into snow-women. Apparently it now has two pairs of boobies. Two pairs. Yep. So you can basically tell if it was made by guys or gals. Definitely the embodiment of the ultimate sex toy slash baby-feeding machine. And just now, on the bus, I saw this guy talking to a girl, except he wasn't really talking to her rather than talking to her chest. I don't care if the male preoccupation with boobs has something to do with some deep-rooted childhood mommy issues, but to degrade a woman and reduce her to just a pair of breasts is so not cool.

Okay, back to my AI boobs.. I mean books. Heheh. I'll be ranting again soon......

Wassalam..........

Assalamu'alaikum....

Just put in a new song, sung by Baby Bash. First time I heard this was on The Sharon Osbourne Show, and I instantly fell for it. Heheh.... hope you'll like this like I do :) .

To two of my girls who are hitting some rough waves in their lives right now, be strong okay? It'll all come to light.

Wassalam...

Assalamu'alaikum..
It's 8.15 in the mornig.... too damn early to do anything, and yet I am up. I have a class in an hour, and by right I can still be asleep and wake up just half an hour before that (the class is really near), but I couldn't go back to sleep after Subuh prayers, and since I'm anticipating a waaaaaaaaaay hectic day ahead, I'm just taking this oppurtunity to sit back and "lepak" for a while and just gather my thoughts.

So last night, I decided to drop all of my dance classes this semester. I mean, there's only 2, but one I have to drop because it's way too early, and for my Javanese Dance class, I dropped that one just to be on the safe side. I mean, I don't need the credit, I already have 13 (12 is the minimum). Plus I realize this week, and the next, is just giving me kinda a basic outline of how my semester will progress..... hectic, with barely enough time to take care of myself. I have to admit, I'm vain enough such that I refuse to give up my Umove classes at the CCRB, plus by February I'll be starting my new job at Pierpont, and with this new "club" I'm entering (which shall be explained later), I'll barely have time to do anything. Granted, a dance class is major easy A, you don't even have to come every single practice, but I feel like I'm taking on too many new things at the same time. I wanna be good at everything that I do, and that requires commitment for each and every single thing. So I dropped the class. I mean, I can always pick it up later, like next fall, or if I do decide to take it this semester (new classes only starts in mid February), I can have Mas Wasi sign a consent for, deliver it to the office, and I can still be in. Admittedly, I'll be so jealous of those taking the advance class this semester, because looking at what the advance class did last semester, the dances are so pretty and soft... and difficult. But I guess I have to swallow that and just hope they still offer it next fall.

It's almost 8.30, and I need to go take a bath, get breakfast, and get ready for class. Toodles!

Wassalam

Assalamu'alaikum...

Aha.... so today was a little bit productive. Did my laundry, practiced dancing, and finished my EECs 492 homework, which is a good thing considering I have to go and return the textbook tomorrow. Oh well... what can we do. Now I'm all worried about the EECS 370 homework and program, as well as the second ME 240 homework. I have a very, very.... old professor for ME 240. And something must be very wrong with the zippers on every pants that he has, because his hands keep straying "there". And he likes to make these very dry, wry and makes-you-wanna-die jokes. Very interesting man. Very old too.

My first ME 240 homework was done with the unwavering help of the ME 240 GSI (graduate student instructor, for those of you not in the know). He's the second GSI that I've had a crush on since I came to Michigan. No, he's not exactly my type kinda cute (like Andy was), but he was such a good teacher, and he was so attentive about explaining stuff and making sure we lowly undergrads understand everything, that I instantly took a big liking to him. It's GSIs like him and Andy that makes me want to get that elusive A for a course even more. Heheh....

Okay, it's late, I have an early day tomorrow, so better get to sleep. Tata peeps and wassalam.....

Assalamu'alaikum.....

Long, long, LONG week..... and I have to say, I probably won't have time to pen in something again until the end of this month. First up is my EECS370 program due next week, then the Javanese Dance performance on February 1st, next is the Cultural Show on Feb 13th, then it's off to my new job at Pierpont. So you can see how my time is organized right now (i.e not orgranized). Everything's so packed. I'm so screwed.

Shit, I forgot another practice I have to go to. I'll catch u guys later, bye!

Wassalam...

Assalamu'alaikum...

Ahahaha.... me happy, vewy, vewy happy. I got the job as a program director at Pierpont Commons. Yippee!!! And I start in February, after my dance performance. Yippee again!!! I can't believe I'm gonna get paid doing something that I actually like : performance arts (i.e singing, dancing, acting etc. ). At least something good is happening in my life right now.

Found out some disturbing facts last night, such as an email that I never received, which is a good thing because if I did get it, my head would have probably exploded. Ahaks! Oh well, things have a way of working out in the end. Oh, and I also found out that i can actually hold a mean grudge on certain people, but if the person matters a lot to me, I can be a big softie too. Huh. Imagine that.

Anyway, I spent 2 hours at the gym yesterday... learning Latin Grooves. Hahaha.... don't ask, it's just something else that is contributing to my "diversity" experience. I mean, I do not want to go back to Malaysia without having done certain "bizarre" things that you don't get a chance to eperience back home unless your're very rich. But seriously, this is gonna be one hectic semester for me. Oh well, at least it'll keep me busy from remembering other stuff (oh, other stuff, why do you plague me so? ). After sweating like crazy, I got back home, took a shower, had dinner with Wann, Nick and Nik, then spent the rest of the night settling some stuff and gabbing on the phone. Very mature of me.

As usual, I was late for my 9.30 class this morning, but by only 10 minutes (hahah), so that's something. I was then half asleep in my Artificial Intelligence class. Why am I taking AI? Because it would look damn impresive in my resume. Heheh... have to think ahead. After that I went to print out some stuff and bumped into Unmesh. We caught up on stuff and gossiped like a pair of schoolgirls, it was fun. But the weird thing is, whenever we talked about someone, suddenly that person would materialize in front of us. I was freaked out, but Unmesh ws laughing like crazy (they were his friends, anyway). Seriously it was like straight out of a Twilight Zone episode. Anyway, we made plans to go out to the movies and hang. Anybody in Michigan wanna come with?

At 1.30 pm, I had my EECS 370 discussion, and after that, I met bumped into Jessica, who then proceeded to tell me about this engineering sorority that she wants to join. She wants me to come with, but I'm not sure yet. Me, sorority girl? I can already hear the laughter and the sound of splitting sides from my friends. Hahaha.. but we'll see. Maybe rushing would be fun, God knows I need fun right now.

Okay, rant and rave time: I hate that as far as females have acheived today, we're still being judged unfairly. I hate that some people still judge me by my looks, or the guy I'm with, or my social standing. Worse of all, I hate that all of their collective negative energy afftects me, making me feel like I'm less than what I am. I'm a good person, I'm smart enough to know my elbow from my butt, and I care about people. Why is that not enough? Stupid, stupid people....

There, I'm fine now (grrr.... ). I better get going, dance class in half an hour. So I'm gonna make like a banana and split.... ciao!

Wassalam....

Assalamu'alaikum....

Wow... 3 entries in one day, amazing, ain't it, hehehe. Anyway, I spent the day in my room today, partly because Dennis was here to install my new hard drive (Western Digital 160GB) and install some new stuff for me. But unfortunately my old files got lost in the process, so right now I'm bugging a few people for my digital pictures and songs.

So right now I finally have my hard drive, installed XP Professional, have my wireless keyboard and mouse to play with (so much fun), and best of all, I have Unreal Tournament in my comp. I know what you're thinking (at least you PC gamers): What?? She plays Unreal Tournament? Hahaha... yes I do, though I've never teamed up with anybody, always me and the computer. I'm not that good with console games, like PS2 or Game Cube, but my brothers are big PC gamers, and some of their collective enthusiasm rubbed off on me. Needless to say, I get an absurdly intense pleasure of blowing people up to smithereens and seeing blood all over the screen.

Dennis was nice enough to leave me with The Sims, Sims Livin' Large and Sims House party, too. I'm a big, big, BIG fan of all Sims game. I spent hours on The Sims and Sims City back home, though I hated the golf course thingy they had a while back. That was kinda boring. And Dennis also introduced me to Theme Hospital, which I have yet to try. *Sigh*.... having a big hard drive is heaven, hahah... though having only 128MB of memory sucks big time.

Like I said, sucky things happen at the beginning of the semester, it can only get better from here, hehehe. You lose some, you gain some. I lost something pretty important to me this week, and I know I don't have a chance of getting it back, but hopefully something better will come along. After all, this is me we're talking about. I've been through shit a lot worse than this, I'll bounce back. Always have, always will :) .

Darn, I miss my playlist, no songs in my comp equals silence...... or me singing, which can wither be a good thing or a bad thing.

Wassalam.....

Assalamu'alaikum...

2 days and counting..... have you ever felt like a fool? I would like to think that nobody knows about this, which is true on my part, but you never know... I've been trying to connect to mirc and download some songs, but to no avail. So I listened to the one I have in my playlist right now, and I found this old tune by Sinead O'Connor. *sigh*... so in the mood for sappy songs right now, though this one has nothing to do with my life be it in the past or the current situation....

Kay, your ex-gf was an ass, you're better off without (heheh, don't let her read this). Miss talking to you too :).

Nothing Compares To You by Sinead O'Connor

It's been seven hours and fifteen days
Since you took your love away
I go out every night and sleep all day
Since you took your love away
Since you been gone I can do whatever I want
I can see whomever I choose
I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant
But nothing
I said nothing can take away these blues
`Cause nothing compares
Nothing compares to you

It's been so lonely without you here
Like a bird without a song
Nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling
Tell me baby where did I go wrong
I could put my arms around every boy I see
But they'd only remind me of you
I went to the doctor n'guess what he told me
Guess what he told me
He said girl u better try to have fun
No matter what you do
But he's a fool
`Cause nothing compares
Nothing compares to you

all the flowers that you planted, mama
In the back yard
All died when you went away
I know that living with you baby was sometimes hard
But I'm willing to give it another try
Nothing compares
Nothing compares to you
Nothing compares
Nothing compares to you
Nothing compares
Nothing compares to you

Wassalam....

Assalamu'alaikum....

Omigod, I survived the first week of school... well, barely anyway. It was a weird, weird, weird week, with classes and other stuff happening in my life. Let's just not get into details. Suffice to say some happenings were surprisingly good, others were so bad that I don't think it can get any worse.

I didn't get much sleep yesterday, spent the night tossing and turning and waking up every few hours. I ended up giving up trying to sleep and just got up. Shitty, shitty feeling right now, I hate it so much. The good side of it? like I said, can't get any worse. Oh well, moving on....

I love this song so much, especially the "if hearts were unbreakable part".....


INVISIBLE by Clay Aiken

What are you doing tonight
I wish I could be a fly on your wall
Are you really alone
Still in your dreams
Why can't I bring you into my life
What would it take to make you see that I'm alive

[Chorus]

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invisible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I can just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
(Wait..I already am)

I saw your face in the crowd
I called out your name
You don't hear a sound
I keep tracing your steps
Each move that you make
Wish I could be what goes through your mind
Wish you could touch me with the colors of your life

[Chorus]

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invisible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I can just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
(Wait..I already am)

I reach out
But you don't even see me
Even when I'm screaming
Baby, you don't hear me
I am nothing without you
Just a shadow passing through...

[Repeat Chorus]

Assalamu'alaikum....

I had the best day 2 days ever.... why? Because KB and Sue were here!!! Ahaha... well, so were Zuhri (ahaks!) , adik KB (Aisha from Penn State ) , and they came with Anuar (betul ke eje name? ) and Zai. Okay, convert to Malay-English for a bit, sorry Jay Jay, ahaha...

Okay, so derang sampai petang Rabu, lepas kol 6 I think. Kesian drive jejauh, heheh. Lepas tuh, aktiviti makan. I cooked rendang, kuah lodeh, kuah kacang (tu instant), lemang and nasik impit (instant jugaaa ). Nasib baik masak, kesian derang lapaq. Lepas tuh, aktiviti paling menarik, hahah. Sue punye birthday was on January 1st (cool gile, ahah), she's FINALLY legal (though she's not gonna do anything with it, I know you pompuan, hahah ), so we were in a pickle sebab nak kene sneak out beli cake. Heheh... so tunggu punye tunggu, akhiynye Sue masuk bathroom pegi mandi. terus aku ngan KB pecut pakai baju, call Zuhri, pastu kitorang 3 org sekali ngan Wann, Zai ngan Anuar pegi Kroger. Tup-tup, stupid blardy Kroger tutup, nasib baik Meijer pujaan hati bukak, so beli ayaq and stuff kat situ. Lokasi beli kek dirahsiakan, muahahah (sebab tau Su suke bace blog aku, keskeskes ). Pastu baru teringat, buku cerite yang org belikan Sue tak tulis pape lagi kat dalam die (beli kat Waldenbooks, "The Last Jihad" by Tatau Sape ). Nasib baik ingat. Okkeh, fast forward, kitorang sampai balik Eaton, elok-elok 5 minutes before midnite, so masuk bilik, nyanyi lagu bedey, ragging-ragging Su sket, pastu soh Sue potong kek sebab takde lilin nak soh die tiup. Kang soh tiup lampu sampai padam kang, pengsan laks. Ngeheh... kitorang belikan Sue carrot cake ngan cheese cake, nyam nyam... ahaha... best gile ade 2 kek

Anyway, the next day, cuti-cuti Ann Arbor. Bawak diorang jalan keliling Central ngan North Campus. Seperti biase, kene bawak gie Law Quad ngan Michigan Union dulu, sebab paling cantik. Then it was all downhill from there, muahaha.. takdelah :). Ingat nak bawak shopping, tapi sume tempat tutup, so bawak diorang gie lunch kat Dinersty, then, gie South Campus carik Big House. Ooopsy, terbawak diorang masuk kancah kesesatan sekejap, as in tersesat carik Big House, terbawak gie Frat Drive over in Washtenaw (? nguahaha, reformed par-tay girl), pastu baru jumpe stadium. Keskeskes... seronok2 amek gambar dalam sejuk2 tuh. After that, North Campus, malangnye Media Union tutup, so beku lah derang amek gambar kat luar. Then balik, kluar malam sket makan kat Denny's, then it was girls nite all the way. Malam tuh lah amek oppurtunity borak2 ngan Sue and KB, catch up on stuff.... macam-macam tatau rupenye.... ( "Khairi dah ade gf" "Ha? Dah ade gf" "Tapi dah break up dah" "Hah? Dah break up dah?" )... bebudak nie pun satu, cerite dah basi berkulat baru nak cakap, hahaha . Tapi seronok lah, baru sedar yang miss diorang gile gile gile actuallynye, suddenly I miss life in PPP so badly.... Ekin, Dayang, korang pulak bile mau visit?

Pagi tadi, bawak diorang gie Steve and Barry's and Michigan Book and Supply, beli t-shirts and other stuff, the gie Dinersty balik (diorang fell for the Malaysia Style fried noodles... yum yummy, siap boleh tapau bawak balik Pudu ), after that, the hardest part of the day...... saying goodbye. Waaa... cedey cedey... I had so much fun while they were here, by far the best part of my holiday :) . Baru blah a few hours, dah miss dah.

Lepas-lepas tuh catch up tido and tgk TV.. ho hum. Can't believe school is starting next wekk, I'm gonna have to bust my ass in the javanese dance class for the performance, adoi lah. Okay, have to go and solat, ciao!

Wassalam...